I was blooming, feeling giddy with excitement. I felt alive in your presence. I felt safe in the humanity of your existence as I navigate the warmth of your heart. There was a fuzzy feeling, joyous, and momentous. I found my paradise in you. Everything was beautiful. The sun’s warmth was gentle on my shoulders. The breeze was kind to my hair. It never rained on my parade. It was paradise. The sun hung from the horizon, the sea was calm, the birds flew above us, the trees were whispering messages of delight. Oh, it was paradise. Me and you, talking endlessly. About mundane stuff, about stuff that would change the world, about life, about love, about you, about me. It was paradise.
Then suddenly, there was a flash of lightning and there was rolling thunder. It rained really hard and nothing but an empty church offered reprieve. I sought your hand, the sound of your heartbeat, but there was none. Then it hit me. You were gone. I was no longer in paradise. I was alone. I could hear the pain sounding both massive and minimal, I never knew one could hear the sound of a heartbreaking. I can hear the sound of something that is tearing up, breaking apart. I can hear my heart ache. I look deep into my psyche and I know I was broken. I am alive and then I am not. You left me here all alone, longing for paradise. In this old church, I pray. I can hear the cry for penance and redemption as I lay flat on the floor. Tears blinded my eyes. I can no longer see you. I can no longer see our paradise.
Promises and hearts were broken. My vision of paradise ceased the day you left me for someone else.